Wednesday, December 1, 2010

an interview with hokies forward jeff allen

From Old Virginia is proud to present its first interview with a walking, talking actual ballplayer. In anticipation of Sunday's hardwood matchup with the despised Hokies, I was able to sit down and have a chat with Virginia Tech senior forward Jeff Allen. I'm sure you'll find him as enlightening and engaging as I did.

First off, let me just thank you for coming, Jeff. Pleasure to have you.

Well, nobody dragged you in here. Let's get down to brass tacks. What's your impression of UVA's hoops team this year, in Tony Bennett's second season?

True, there's definitely some bad blood between the two. Let's talk about the Hokies themselves. About a week ago I bet on VT to cover against Cal State-Whatever and naturally you guys came up one point shy. Any thoughts on your performance in that game?

Ahh, true. You did foul out of that one, as indeed you've done in three of the Hokies' six games this year. That is a truly astounding statistic. I guess the lesson learned for all good Hoos thinking of betting on the Hokies is: don't. They'll screw you every time. Do you think you'll be able to avoid fouling out against UVA's Mike Scott?

No? Well, it can't be denied that Scott is a hell of a player. I can see how the emotions of a game against your rivals at home could get out of hand. Still, don't you think -

Quiet down in the peanut gallery, oft-photoshopped obscene gesture moppet. Where did a kid your age learn to do that anyway?

Oh. Yeah, I should have guessed. Well, he fits right in anyway. So, Jeff, before we wrap this up, any predictions on Sunday's game?

Yikes, the double deuce. You have to admire a man whose convictions are strong. Well, it's been a pleasure, Jeff. Most insightful. Hope to have you back on the blog again sometime in the future - perhaps after another Hokies trip to Maryland, I'm sure you know how those fans can inspire a little emotion in a guy. You'll find the door over on the right.