Tuesday, November 3, 2009

ACC roundtable

It's that time again. This edition is brought to you by From the Rumble Seat. Let's go ahead and get straight to it.

1. Alright fellas, this is your turn to apologize to the Boston College Eagles who went to Hell and back and have now arrived as the 3rd team for the ACC (and only team in the Atlantic) to be bowl eligible. You know you were snickering in the preseason. Also, give a high five to Mark Herzlich for finishing his last treatment of chemo.

High five. As for the apology, like hell. Going bowling is reward enough, isn't it? Chances are pretty excellent that Boston College will be our seventh loss and therefore officially eliminate us from bowl contention. Apologize? They should apologize to us.

But seriously, it's cool that Herzlich looks about done with that whole nasty cancer thing.

2. An Orange Bowl victory over a Boise/ TCU or an Orange Bowl victory over a Penn State/ Cincy team - which means more for the conference? Is there even a difference?

Penn State would mean the most, but only if the ACC rep is Georgia Tech, which right about now is the only ACC team that the national media really takes seriously. (Probably Miami also.) GT/PSU would be a great matchup. The only benefit to beating BSU or TCU is one that I'd enjoy and few others would, because I'm the lunatic that doesn't want a playoff. An ACC win over Boise or TCU wouldn't really elevate the ACC much in the eyes of the world - the message it would send is that the best of the mid-majors still can't hack it even against the lower end of the BCS conferences after all.

3. Enough with the CJ Spillers, the Christian Ponders, and the Jacory Harrises. We wanna talk defense. Who is the defensive POTY thus far in the ACC?

Robert Quinn of UNC and Derrick Morgan of GT are getting plenty of well-deserved press for being quarterback-terrorizing sackmasters, and I really have to throw a nod to BC's Luke Kuechly, leading the ACC in total tackles as a true freshman. That's one recruiting battle I really wanted to win at the time and even more so now.

But guess what. I'm gonna play favorites here and I don't care what anyone thinks. Nate Collins is your DPOY and that is a fact. Collins is the only defensive lineman in the ACC's top ten in tackles, and this in a defense that asks its lineman mainly to occupy offensive linemen and leave the playmaking to the linebackers. Morgan and Quinn don't even sniff the top 50. Not even close. Nice gaudy sack totals, but they're not run-stuffers. Collins is also ACC-top-five in sacks with five, and that's five solo sacks, no cheesy assists. And then there's that interception return for a touchdown. Collins doesn't get the accolades that he should because we kinda suck. But he's the best complete defensive lineman in the league so far this year.

4. Recently, Bird compared the Atlantic to the Big 12 North. Is this a fair comparison? The Coastal is currently 8-2 against the Atlantic. There are still 8 interdivision games left. Can the Atlantic redeem itself this season?

Let's see, those games would be:

BC-UVA
BC-UNC
Clemson-UVA
Md.-VT
NCSt.-UNC
NCSt.-VT
Wake-GT
Wake-Duke

I count two that should definitely go the Atlantic's way (and you know what those are. Hint: I hate football.) I count three that should definitely be Coastal wins, so that puts the record at 11-4, Coastal, with three tossups (NCSt.-UNC, BC-UNC, Wake-Duke) that frankly don't look too good for the Atlantic.

So no. Only way this goes well for the Atlantic is if they win the ACCCG, which is definitely a loss for the conference at large. Clemson or BC might come out with a pretty good looking record, but they'll just be kings of the mud.

And yes, the comparison is legit. The teams at the top of the B12N aren't as good as in the Atlantic, but the Atlantic's bottom teams are worse.

5. Tailgating is essential to all things football. In Atlanta, the tailgating game of choice is cornhole. What is your game of choice to pass the time?

Drinking. Cornhole's pretty sweet too. Fortunately, they're very complementary.

6. Let's cut to the chase. There are two kinds of people: sheep and sharks. Sharks are winners and they don't look back 'cause they don't have necks. Necks are for sheep. Is your team full of sharks or is your team full of sheep?

Sharks, but the kind that get eaten by octopuses. They try hard. They'll bite the shit out of you if you're not careful. They just, you know, get eaten by octopuses anyway. Ones named "Duke."

7. Create a cocktail in the spirit of your school and explain it to us. Non-edible ingredients are allowed and encouraged.

Aw, I'm no good at bartending and mixing drinks and what not. TJ was a voice of democracy, a man for the people. The Lawn was designed so that professors would mingle with students. Crack open a beer, there's your cocktail. No drink is more democratic than beer. Then drink it and crack open a whole bunch more, because we like to think that's what we do.

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